That Girl

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As the year draws to an end, like many others I find myself reflecting on the past 12 months. The highs, the lows, the good, the bad, the experiences and the lessons.

This year there has been one thing that has stuck out more than anything and it’s seemed to reoccur the last few years, DISAPPOINTMENT!

I’ve always been THAT girl. That girl who will always be the first to call and text. THAT girl who will share the latest bargain or discount code. THAT girl who loves to make plans and invite everyone to make as many fabulous memories as possible but all too many times it has dawned on me that because I’m THAT girl people take me for granted.

This year, more so than others, it has really dawned on me just how much effort I put into my relationships with friends and families and how complacent that those friends and family have become in assuming that I’ll just always be the one who will continue to make an effort.

Truth is, I just can’t and won’t do it anymore. As someone who has suffered with anxiety and depression in the past I know from first hand experience that toxic relationships, bad vibes and negative thoughts are a perfect recipe for encouraging depression and anxiety to creep back in a quite frankly, I want that door to remain closed.

This year there have been some people who have really shocked me with their actions or just showing me how low down on their list of priorities I am. People who I would have never had imagined in a million years would make me feel this way. When you are the one constantly making an effort and feeling like it’s unappreciated or not reciprocated it can lead to a feeling of loneliness, unworthiness and just plain upset, everything I don’t want to feel. So moving into 2019 I just cannot be THAT girl any more.

Happiness and fulfilment are 2 things that are top of my list for next year and I know that in order to achieve them I need to leave disappointment and negative energy in the past and surround myself with positive and uplifting influences. I know that I am the only one that can be responsible for my happiness so I need to ensure that my lifestyle is reflective of that.

Heading into 2019 I NEED to be THAT girl. THAT girl who smashes her goals, THAT girl who realises her self worth, THAT girl who makes fabulous memories and THAT girl who doesn’t let disappointment limit the amazing life I know I deserve to have.

 What are you leaving in 2019?
Emma xoxo

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